Tuesday, August 26, 2008

My Sex Life Sucks

My Sex Life Sucks
How do you know when your sex life sucks? If at least 2 of the following conditions are TRUE for your sex life it probably sucks:

  • You leave the television on while you make love.
  • Your dog, cat and/or Iguana doesn’t get off the bed anymore, they just ride it out looking angry and knowing.
  • The most recent spontaneous thing you did together was the laundry.
  • Your last conversation about sex was in college.
  • Dinner and a movie is really dinner and a movie.
  • You purchased a flat screen TV in time for the Super Bowl.
  • You are never in sync, when he is ready she is tired and vice versa.
  • The actual act of sex is taking less and less time.
  • Your last love making session didn’t make it through the entire commercial break on American Idol.
  • The last massage you received was from your dryer, whirlpool, pet or those strange wooden things on the back of your car seat.
  • You would rather go to the Dentist than make love with your partner (this condition counts as 2).

    [ Send your favorite My Sex Life Sucks Because….ideas to siiweb @ Bettersex . com and we will include them here. ]

My Sex Life Sucks, Now What?
Having a less than rewarding sex life is not uncommon. I loved this AARP Sexuality In Midlife study stat:

Nearly one-third of men and women with partners ranked their sex life somewhere between "yawn" and "bloody awful.

Here is how that scale would look:

If your sex life sucks, you are not alone (by a long shot). We’ve seen a disturbing trend of ever young people complaining of “boring” sex lives. We are so MTVed and over saturated by media we habituate to anything now at hyper speeds and that condition brings us to our first tip.

Better Sex Life Tip 1: Slow Down
Why do we speed up things that should be slow and slow down things that should be fast? The tide of our lives pulls us hither and yon. Speed seems to have its own self justifying course. We are important because we are so busy. We are so busy because we are important. This is circular goofy reasoning. The problem is it is VERY ADDICTIVE goofy circular reasoning.

The first “slow down” step is finding a new center. This sounds eastern and it is (to some degree). Moving your center, soul, source (whatever you name it) to the love you create means you slow down. You slow down because you are in control. You are important because of your connections and the love, generosity and spirit those connections create. Once you pierce the hot air surrounding your life’s “speed” you realize it is a self created mirage. Start your “slow down” journey by recovering your family, friends, pets and self. Cut out time, deflate the “hype” balloon and listen to every day’s unique song. Relocating your center can be hard. Here are some ideas that may help:

  • Walks to break up your work day – take a walk midmorning and in the middle of the afternoon if you can. Get out of the office, away from your computer, cube and phone. Don’t “speed walk” but get your heart rate up. Try to segment your walk. During those segments, however long, think of a single thing.
  • Use music to slow down – Ever notice how you match intensity of your workout to your music? The opposite is also true. Music can help you slow your process too. When I was in college a very hip musician friend played a record by Frank Sinatra and Brazilian Antonio Carolos Jobim . Seemed like a strange idea until I listened to the music. It is beautiful, soulful music guaranteed to slow you down.
  • Eat Slow especially when you are starving - eating, in this example, is a proxy for making love. If you can slow eating down by 25% or 50% you use the same mental muscles you need to slow down physical hunger during sex.
  • Watch a natural process every day to completion – nature has its own rhythm. 300 daily emails, 20 voicemails, crying children and impatient coworkers aren’t natural. Watch a bird landing on your feeder and grabbing a little dinner or wind winding its way through trees. Find one natural thing and watch it until completion.
  • Visualize slowness – you’ve probably read how sports stars visualize their victories. You can do the same. Create a mental image of yourself doing an activity at 2x or 3x your normal pace. Slow down non-sexual activities to create “slow-down” muscles. Sex is hard to slow down, so if you practice on slowing down your reading, cooking or driving you develop muscle needed when tackling the hardest thing to slow down – sex.
  • Practice being in the moment – living in the moment we are in may be the hardest thing we ever attempt. If someone calls you on the phone DON’T keep working on your computer as you talk. Be fully in that conversation. If you are listening to your partner isolate, reduce or eliminate “back talk” from the voice in your head. Be present and listen. Don’t bring the past or present into now (won’t do any good anyway). Like nature, each moment has a rhythm and a beat. When you are making love, each moment has a bridge to the next. Pay attention, provide feedback and focus you mind on what is happening NOW and you will slow down even doing the hardest thing there is to slow down – making love.

More soon.

Be sure to share your “My sex life sucks because….”

Do you have great music, helpful slowdown practices or any ideas that will help?

Send your emails to siiweb @ BetterSex . com with “my sex life sucks” in the subject line.

Link Ideas for immediate help:

Free Online Better Sex Love Program

Dr. Lori Buckley’s web site

How To Have Better Sex Tonight article.

25% off Site Labor Day Sale

25% Off The Site Labor Day Sale *
Every now and again we get to create one of our favorite sales. We love 25% off the site sales because:

  • Easy to create for us because the offer fires into your cart. Put an item in there and presto, chango 25% off.
  • Customers love site wide sales because they get to buy whatever they want ON SALE.
  • Easy to understand - put stuff in your cart and 25% comes off the top.

Why Did we create this sale?
Here is what came to mind (included on our Learn More) page:

  • End of the Summer
  • Olympics are over
  • Football really hasn't started yet
  • Everyone in NC is at the beach
  • Economy sucks
  • The Jungian thing

The Jungian Thing
The Jungian Thing is the ability to hold two opposing ideas in your mind at once a la Private Joker in Kurick's movie Full Metal Jacket. The two opposing ideas, in this case, would be "shop online" over the last weekend of summer. We started the sale yesterday so you can achieve a Jungian state (buy stuff and then hit the beach).

* Almost Everything ...
Less than 1% of our products can't play in a sale like this usually due to agreements with manufacturers or high costs to us. We try to clearly tattoo "not available for discounts" on products affected by either condition.

Best Sellers
Use that link to view our Learn More page, top 10 best sellers this summer on the bottom of the page.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Free 2 Day Air Email

Missed Free 2-Day Offer - Sign Up For Email
In addition to our 25% off Labor Day Sale, our email community received a special offer of Free 2 Day air when their purchase is $59.00 or more. Don't miss our next speicial offer, get on our email list:

Sign Up For Sinclair Email List

Can't Get Your Emails At Work - Follow Us On Twitter
Some spam filters may trap our emails even though our emails come from Responsys, our email provider, not BetterSex.com. We don't want you to miss out, so follow BetterSexWeb on Twitter. We will be sure to publish our best email offers on Twitter:


Better Sex Summer Erotic Fiction - Finalists

4 Finalists Go To Judges Today
After 11 weeks, hundreds of stories and thousands of votes, four stories are finalists in our Better Sex Erotic Fiction Contest:

Semifinals Week 1 Winner: Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs by Annie Kerns

Semifinals Week 2 Winner: Beach Break by B. B. Giddens

Runner Up 1: Innocent Corruption by Larissa Lyons

Runner up 2: Temple of Venus by Anna Bookner

The Grand Prize winner will be determined by a 3 judge panel. Four stories (two semifinalists and two runner ups) went to the judges today. We will post judge's decision here the day after Labor Day (September 2nd). We modified our original idea from 3 stories to 4 stories as "Finalists" after voting irregularities were discovered last week. Temple of Venus, the best finishing second place story during our contest, was elevated to winning Week 9 replacing the story that experienced voting irregularities. I blogged extensively about this problem in my The Way Things Go Sometimes post on Friday August 22nd.

Vote for your favorite!
The $2,500 Grand Prize will be awarded by our 3 judge panel. We want to know what story you like best. We will update this blog posts with links as soon as they are available.

Good luck to all authors! Don't forget the deadline for the Fall Better Sex Erotic Fiction Contest is November 1st. Fall will be similar to Summer in the way the contest operates. Full details will be posted here next week. If you would like to get a jump on our Fall contest, send stories to:

siiweb @ BetterSex .com "Fall Fiction Contest submission" as the subject.

Wondering why we created the Better Sex Erotic Fiction Contest = use that link to read my explanation to one of our writers in our Revolution blog.

Yes, our "Ivoted" code still knocks $5.00 off your order if you vote for your favorite story in this week's non-binding poll.




Msmith @ BetterSex . com

Friday, August 22, 2008

The Way Things Go Sometimes

Life is Funny
A couple of years ago I created the Better Sex Fiction Contest because I wanted to do something different, something fun and "out-of-the-box" as cliché as that sounds (Why Create Better Sex Erotic Fiction Contest = takes you to my long riff on the origins of the contest). This week I had to do a hard thing. I had to remove a story I like from an author I admire. This is not something I wanted to do (at all), but our poll was being repeatedly hacked by a well meaning friend of the author. I've spoken with the author and admire his detective work and attitude. He understood why we had to do what we did and he went about finding out who did what. He asked me how I would prevent another similar instance in the future and, as I write this, I have no idea. I love the fact that someone cared enough about the story to want to elevate it, but, as these Olympics prove, fair is more important than anything else.

Sometimes it isn't easy to know what "fair" is, where the line is today. So many things in life are not fair, but the struggle to understand “fair” and act on that understanding may be the most important thing we create. I read a great book by Dov Seidman. His book How believes our future business relationships will be with companies who are human and follow the golden rule. Who we are and How we are is more important that what we do in an age where anyone can do pretty much anything. Our ethics established by how we act are what matters.

Another friend, Susan Bratton at Personal Life Media, talks about "radical authenticity". The first challenge of authenticity is to know yourself. I know how hard knowing yourself can be (harder at some times than others). Businesses have a second challenge because they are a collection of people, places and things. Radical authenticity in our sexual health arena is a must. There are no small decisions today ever.

Quick Side Story
I like to ride my bicycle long distances, but I am not a mechanic (at all). I take my bike to a local bike shop and depend on their skill and expertise. About a year ago my bike was in for a tune up. The tech behind the counter seemed somewhere else. He wasn't paying attention. It worried me. I love my bike and only want it handled with care. I handed over "my baby" with fear and trepidation. A couple of days later I was excited to ride my newly tuned bike. I headed out on a long ride. Everything seemed great until I got to the top of a steep hill. Just as I started to descend my handlebars slipped forward almost throwing me from the bike. That wasn't the scariest part. The way the bars moved meant my brakes were out of reach. I had to hold on for life the best I could as my speed headed north of 40 mph. The inattention of a single bike mechanic could have killed me. Once I was safely at the bottom of the hill I realized that we are more connected now than ever. A butterfly flapping its wings in Hong Kong may create a Hurricane in North Carolina (where I live and where we are past due for a big storm).

I love our Better Sex Erotic Ficiton Contest even when it is a complete pain in the backside. One of my favorite authors, whose name I will withhold in order not to prejudice this week's voting, wrote me an amazing touching and personal note today. I realized how much this peson, a person I've never met who lives a half a world away, meant to me. Like many of the authors who've entered our contest she is my friend.

Life Is Funny
I didn't mean to write such a long rambling post. The point, buried deeply in here, is we are in this together. We (BetterSex.com) will work to be in the moment and tighten your handlebars (or whatever). We will try to find "fair" and live there. We will support causes that are important to us, sometimes with the dollars you give us, such as aids prevention and family planning around the planet (DKT), writers of erotic fiction and the battle to cure cancer in our lifetime. Fun and pleasure along the journey is OK too, in limited amounts of course.

If you are still reading this, and that seems like almost too much to ask on a Friday, thanks for your support and have a great weekend. Don't forget to VOTE for your favorite story in our erotic fiction contest - this is the last week of community voting. We will have a grand prize winner just after Labor Day.

Have a great weekend everyone.

msmith @ BetterSex . com

P.S. If you didn't win our His and Her iPod contest I'm sorry. I never win anything either and I couldn't even enter my own contest (lawyers stink :) ). We will have another cool contest soon so be sure to check back.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

iPod Winner Notified - Quote Soon

iPod Winner Notified
Our "His" and "Hers" iPod winner has been notified and accepted.

They are signing the necessary Uncle Sam forms and confirming their "I can't believe I won" quote. As soon as we have that ear splitting scream of joy we will share it here. I am not a good enough writer to convey their unbounded joy in words. We will include their quote here soon. At least we didn't show up at their house like the Prize Patrol and scare the pants off them. Ever see those people? I guess if you win $1,000,000 you could care less how you look on TV and you know that is what the Patrol wants.

Thanks for everyone who entered. We will have another contest soon.


Better Sex Fiction Contest - Last Weekend To Vote

Erotic Fiction Semifinals Round 2 - Vote Now
Want to read some great hot erotic fiction this weekend? Want to do a good deed this weekend? How often do you get to do something fun that also helps others? Go to our Better Sex Summer Erotic Fiction Contest and vote for your favorite story. Almost 300 people voted last weekend and 4 anxious authors await your feedback.

Every vote counts. 3 stories will move to the finals (winner from last week, winner from this week and the story with the next most votes). Your vote could make the difference. Even better, we pay you to vote. Use the promotion code Ivoted in our cart and we will pay you $5.00 to vote (as a credit on your order). Don't forget to click "update cart" to confirm the discount.

Contest Change
A story was removed from our contest this morning after our algorithm detected unnatural voting patterns.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Better Sex Podcasts - Soon

Personal Life Media
We are working with our friends at Personal Life Media to create a free Better Sex podcast widget. PLM is a very cool site with tons of great free content on just about any subject you can name. We have the Better Sex Podcast widget on our QA site, think of QA as a scene that is backstage waiting for its turn on stage. I am about to write copy for the top of our Better Sex University page.

End of Free Condoms
If you are playing at home you know that our new Better Sex Podcasts will replace our Free Condom offer. We shipped 100 people free condoms this summer just because we thought that would be a cool thing to do. Today is the last day of the free condoms at least for a little bit.

Funny Free Condom Story
Before I sold sex toys and worked for world peace as I do now, I owned a cool gift company. If you've ever played with magnetic words on your fridge or locker then you've bought or played with a product the company I co-founded helped bring to market. We went to large gift shows in New York and San Francisco. Our booth contained thousands of magnetic words on a metal wall and bowls of Jenny Holzer condoms.

In New York we would come in every morning and read the wall. I've never seen so many creative uses of "sausage" before. We would edit out the most raunchy haiku and get ready for another day of trade show craziness. We had to refill Jenny Holzer condoms, we kept them in a huge glass bowl, a couple of times during the New York show.

Jenny's art is words. She creates advertising-like riffs such as THE FUTURE IS STUPID and usually paints her art on LED displays in museums or projected on the side of buildings (cool picture of projecting Jenny's art on Wikipedia - use the link above). We sold Holzer condoms with "Holzerisms" printed on them. The most popular Holzer condom was PROTECT ME FROM WHAT I WANT.

When we moved our traveling circus to the San Francisco gift show we had to read the wall every morning, AND we had to fill the condom bowl every morning. The San Francisco Gift Show is about 1/4 the size of New York, but we always had to plan for 4X as many condoms for San Francisco, the city by the bay. I love San Francisco. If I could afford it I would be writing this blog from a warehouse at the bottom of one of those great giant hills. If you can, be sure to get to Frisco before September is over to see Frida Kahlo at SF MoMA. This show of Kahlo's singular paintings, from what friends tell me, is not to be missed.

Long story about why if you want a free condom, you need to visit the Better Sex University before tomorrow. If Free Condoms is something you like and want us to do again let us know.

Protect me from what I want,

msmith @ BetterSex . com

P.S. Want to read more Martin museum riff? Read Top 5 Summer Museums on ScentTrail, or type "top summer museums" into Google.

Monday, August 18, 2008

Better Sex Erotic Fiction Contest - Why Create?

Better Sex Revolution Blog
Since creating the Better Sex Erotic Fiction Contest we've received many questions about why BetterSex.com would create such a contest. The contest is a labor of love. One of our writers, Lynn Lake author of Traffic Jammed, asked about why we created the contest. Use the link below if you are curious and would like to know more.

Better Sex Erotic Fiction Contest...Why Create?

Better Sex Erotic Fiction Semifinals

Vote in Round 2 Now!

The second round of the Better Sex Summer Erotic Fiction Contest Semifinals started today. Here are the stories competing for a spot in the finals:

Story 1: Flat Tire: The Adventures of Jaronda Monroe By L. R. Stewart

Story 2: Stimulus Software, Inc. By Anya Werner

Story 3: The HouseSitters By A. J. Riley

Story 4: Blindfold By Elle Buchanan

Story 5: Beach Break By B. B. Giddens

After you vote, use "Ivoted" in our cart to save $5.00 on your order today. Don't forget to click on "update cart" after you input the code as this confirms the discount.

Snow White & The Vampire Wins Round 1
Anne Kerns innovative story about the day Disney met Wes Craven won our first semifinal round with 41% of the vote. This means Snow White will be in the finals. Larissa Lyons' story Innocent Corruption came in second last week.

Round 2's stories will compete for a week. Next Monday, we will know the 3 stories that will go to the judges. Innocent Corruption will go if it receives more votes than the runner up to our winner this week. This is why every vote counts.

Once our 3 finalists stories are selected they will be read and voted on by a 3 judge panel. We will also hold a non-binding community poll next week to receive our community input on who they think should win the Grand Prize. We will award the Grand Prize on September 2nd.

Fall Better Sex Fiction Contest
We've received several submissions for our Fall Erotic Fiction writing contest. If your story did not make the summer contest your story is automatically entered in the fall contest. The fall contest submission deadline is November 1st.

Good Luck to all authors.


msmith @ BetterSex . com

Friday, August 15, 2008

His and Hers Ipod Contest - Winner Selected

Winner Selected
I don't know about you, but I never win anything. The winner of the Better Sex His and Her iPod Contest has been selected and notified via email. They have until Tuesday to accept the prize. We know that the winner only entered once and is new to BetterSex.com. We selected 2 runner-ups and we will go down the list if we don't hear from the winner by Tuesday.

Thanks to everyone who entered our contest.


Better Sex Summer Erotic Fiction Contest - Semifinals

Martin's Dream
I had a Sleepless Night last night. I dreamed about Snow White and a Vampire wearing Sensible Shoes. The was a girl named Penny and she was reading a story called Penny's Pleasure in the back seat of a car caught in a Traffic Jam. I kept shouting, "I'm innocent, I'm innocent," to a judge who said, "you are Innocently Corrupted." I woke up realizing I needed to blog about our Better Sex Erotic Fiction Contest Semifinals.

Last Weekend To Vote...Round One
Here is how the votes shape up as of Friday around lunch:

Story 1: "Sensible Shoes"
Story 2: "Innocent Corruption"
Story 3: "Penny's Pleasure"
Story 4: "Snow White & the Vampire"
Story 5: "Traffic Jammed"
Story 6: "A Sleepless Night"

Your Vote & A Writer's Dream
Your vote may make a writer's dream come true because our top prize is worth over $2,500. The money is important, but most of our writers are also looking for some street cred. They want confirmation, support and encouragement.

Remember three stories will become finalists. Read the stories and vote for your favorite even if they aren't winning this round because your favorite could still win the GRAND PRIZE.

Why am I so tired today? Must have been that crazy dream I had last night :).

Have a great weekend everyone.

msmith @ bettersex . com

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Silicone Triple - Gold Medal Sex Toy

Silicone Triple Orgasm Cock Ring Wins Gold
It was a close race. The touch at the end of the pool had three sex toys breaking the world record in a neck-and-neck race. Alas, there could only be one winner. One Gold Medalist. It was exciting to see the Silver Medalist from the last games, the Silicone Triple, edge out the new contender and previous world record holder, the Rabbit Super Vibrator and Head Honcho. We had a chance to speak with the Silicone Triple after his victory and here is what he said:

"Wow what a day. We had a great race. I followed the Rabbit Super Vibe off the turn and thought there was no way to catch him since he's beaten me before. I did feel him fading about midway through the last lap. I poured it on figuring I could breathe later," the Silicone Triple said laughing.
Certainly that was one of the closest races this announcer has ever seen. The Silicone Triple just wanted it more. Great races from all three competitors. What is next for the Silicone Triple?
"My people are speaking with people. We will be announcing a major endorsement deal in the lubrication category soon. Right now I am just looking to head home and see my family," the Silicone Triple said as he toweled his head and headed toward the locker room.

See all race competitors = use this link to view all competitors.

Silicone Triple - Gold Medal (25% Off)

Rabbit Super Vibrator - Silver Medal (15% Off)

Head Honcho = Bronze Medal (10% Off)

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Follow BetterSexWeb on Twitter

What kind of better sex secrets will you find on our BetterSexWeb Twitter feed? We plan three kinds of content for our Twitter feed:

Twitter Better Sex Promotions - Special codes and incentives for our Twitter followers.

Twitter Better Sex Tips - If you were to watch all of our adult sex education titles it woutld take a month, so we will grab tips and share them on Twitter.

What is Happening on BetterSex.com - Our web site changes all the time. We will Twitter notice of new products, polls or cool content.

Twitter Better Sex Emergencies - if we have a bad ice storm or an outage we will use Twitter to notify customers of any delays and recoveries.

Better Sex Gold Medal Toy Poll

Close Race After Prelims....
Not sure if we are in the "bird's nest" or the "cube", but we have a very close race shaping up in our Olympic Sex Toy Poll. Your vote may break the tie.

Vote Now and Save 10% Today (use this link to place your vote and see our special code for voters).

Results So Far

Silicone Triple Orgasm Cockring (tied for first)

16 Function Rabbit Supper Vibe
(tied for first)

Head Honcho Masturbator (tied for second)

Pear Panther Rabit Vibe (tied for second)

Finals are today, so VOTE NOW.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Better Sex Summer Erotic Fiction - Semifinals

Vote Today - Your Vote Matters
As I write this there is an aspiring erotic fiction writer sitting on the edge of his or her seat. This nervous writer is one of 11 semi-finalists in our summer erotic fiction contest. Ours may be the first contest they've ever entered and now their story is battling it out with 10 others for a Grand Prize of over $2,500, not a fortune but potentially the most money this author has ever made from their writing. The other prize, becoming a published author, may be the most important. Money is fleeting ISBN numbers are forever. Help us select our 3 finalists, the stories that garner the most votes, and you will be rewarded with great summer reading, our thanks and an author's appreciation.

Vote Now

Snow White = Early Lead
Snow White and the Vampire is leading the first week of the semifinals. Be sure to vote for your favorite story because 3 finalists will be chosen. Your vote may make the difference for a story and an author.

Better Sex Fall Erotic Fiction Contest
We received so many great stories for our summer contest we have no choice but to have another contest. We will be having a fall erotic fiction contest, but we will be managing the contest differently. No more rolling admissions since it is just too hard to keep up and great stories that come in late don't get a fair shake. The submission deadline for the fall contest is November 1st, 2008. Here is a link to our original blog post about the fall contest:

Better Sex Fall Erotic Fiction Contest

Friday, August 8, 2008

Last Weekend Win 2 iPods

Win "His" and "Her" iPods with Better Sex Videos
This is the last weekend of our iPod contest. One lucky person will win 2 iPods pre-loaded with our latest adult sex education titles guaranteed to improve your love life. Can having The Better Sex Video Series® on an iPod touch that you can actually watch in bed improve your love life? Can't hurt right? That is what we are thinking. Now if he is watching "his" in one room and she is watching "hers" in another it may not work the way we are thinking. Well, wait a minute here. She is watching. He is watching. Yeah that will work.

Can't Win If You Don't Double Opt In
When you sign up for the contest we send you an email. YOU MUST CLICK ON THAT EMAIL TO BE IN THE DRAWING. Not sure if you double opted in? Safest thing to do is use the link below to register again and click on the email we send.

I want the iPod's - Take me to the form darn it.

I Never Win...
I hear you. I never win contests either. Lottery where are you when I really need you? This is why we built in special secret codes for everyone who enters. Even if you don't take home the iPods you can still save some money. One day soon let's grab a beer and we can figure out how to win the lottery.

What would you do if you won the lottery?
My boss asked me what I would do if I won the lottery today at lunch. "Continue to work for BetterSex.com," I said without missing a beat. She laughed. If I won the lottery I would pay people to help me create SurfCure.org. SurfCure is the not-for-profit I am working on (with friends and not a lot of time or money) to help patients facing serious health challenges share the tips and tricks they learn. If you would like to know more about SurfCure you can go to my blog post about it at ScentTrail (my blog) or check out our place holder at http://www.surfcure.org. SurfCure is a little stuck in the mud right now, so let me know if you have ideas or thoughts.

Have a great weekend everyone.

msmith @ bettersex . com

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

BetterSex.com Says Thanks!!!

Best Customers In The World
Everyone at BetterSex.com, the Sinclair Institute and my web teams says a huge THANKS to our customers for making this year's Better Sex Summer Sale so successful. It sounds like brown nosing to say we have the best customers in the world, but we do. Here are just a few exciting things we accomplished together this summer:

  • Over 500 customers voted in our, "Tell BetterSex.com what to put on sale" poll.
  • The winning toy, the Pearl Panther, went on back order for a short period (until the truck arrived). We've kept the Panther on sale to say THANKS for voting and helping.
  • We received great feedback on how to improve our shopping cart. Tomorrow we will share our new design for your feedback here. Read my How BetterSex.com Free Shipping Works article inspired by customer feedback. My take-away is, when you have to work as hard as I did to explain something it is TOO HARD. We will fix our cart and appreciate our customer's insight and ideas.
  • We created a His and Hers iPod contest that thousands entered (this is only a week left to enter and don't forget you can't win if you don't double opt in).
  • We've discovered great new authors in our Better Sex Erotic Fiction Contest - the semi-finals start next week. Who will be the Best Erotic Fiction writer this summer? Your vote will determine.
  • Our last day Free Shipping email was a HUGE hit, so be sure to sign up for our emails so you don't miss the next "email only" special.

We are taking about a minute to breathe, hum our mantras and say THANKS after our biggest online sale ever. While we can't believe the summer is almost over, here in North Carolina school buses will dot the landscape again in about a week. We appreciate everyone's support, ideas and encouragement this summer!

We are riffing new ideas in August. We replaced our Better Sex Summer Sale with $19.95 DVD sale. We are testing this lower price on more than 200 DVD titles. We sell adult movies because therapists and sex educators tell us adult movies can be a source of ideas and creative inspiration for couples trying to get out of a sexual rut. And, yes we did used to read the articles in Playboy too....:)

Almost All DVD's $19.95 + Buy any 2 DVD's Receive 25% off any toy

BetterSex.com sells the adult sex education titles we create such as The Better Sex Video Series ® and Great Sex For A Lifetime more than anything. Sex Toys are next and a distant third is the sex positive adult movies that clear our Sinclair Select screening process. Every adult DVD we sell is reviewed and checked against "sex positive" criteria. Our reviewer writes several hundred words on every DVD. We are working on moving these reviews online. They are hilarious and insightful (read TailGunners review as an example). Please don't apply to be our Adult Movie Reviewer as that job is currently filled (lol). We will be enrolling Better Sex Buzz Team members again in September, and.....

I Want To Work For BetterSex.com Internship Contest...coming soon
I was watching I Want To Work For Diddy last night on VH1 and thought, "Hey we have a cooler, much more fun internship," so I am working on the I Want To Work For BetterSex.com Internship Contest right now. The contest will pit North Carolina residents against each other for the coolest internship on the planet. When you work at BetterSex.com you get to think of Sex and World Peace (literally), so what could be cooler? Work here for 6 months learning SEO, web marketing and content development and we guarantee your resume will jump off the pile. We can help you get their attention, closing the six figure salary you know you deserve will be up to you. More details soon.....

Kudos to BetterSex.com Web Team
I just gathered my team into a meeting room to say THANKS. A little over 90 days ago our Graphic Designer, Web Merchandiser and Email Marketing Manager left us to go to startup land. Yes, I thought my life was over. We hired 3 great people in 3 days and they have rocked the house. THANKS to the BetterSex.com web team for diving in and doing a great job! My privilege is to work with such a great professional team. Way to go guys!!!

Msmith @ bettersex . com

Monday, August 4, 2008

Better Sex - How Free Shipping Works

Better Sex Cart = Misleading
Our cart contains a "shipping estimate". In fact, $7.95 is the most you will pay for standard shipping. The cart is not dynamic. Shipping cost actually vary from $0.00 to $7.95, so the cart represents the worst case scenario (the most you will ever pay for Standard Shipping).

Your order may qualify for Free Shipping (when you purchase $59.00 or more and/or when you respond to an email offering Free Shipping), but you won't see $0.00 in the shipping costs until after you login. This is confusing and we are working to fix it. Good rule is, ignore the cart. Your actual costs will be confirmed after you login.

In the example above (A) tells me my order qualifies for Free Shipping while (B) says I will pay $7.95. (B) is wrong and misleading. After I login or select "guest" I see the correct charge ($0.00) confirmed at stage 2 of our checkout.


Select your shipping option
$0.00 for Standard Shipping

(2 week average)
$6.00 for Priority Mail
(3 business days average)
$6.00 for 2 Day Air
(Guaranteed Delivery by 08/07)
Tracking Number provided via email.
$14.00 for 1 Day Air
(Guaranteed Delivery by 08/06)
Tracking Number provided via email.

Orders requesting next day delivery and placed by 2:45 EST will arrive next day except during Holiday shipping periods.

The Fix
Our first step is to fix the language so it is clear that the shipping cost you see in our cart is only an estimate and a worst case estimate at that. We hope to have new language up in this area in a few days. Thanks to everyone who helped us understand just how confusing this area is and big THANKS to those who pressed on and saw the correct shipping charge on step 2 of their checkout.

50% Free Shippers upgrade to 2 Day
About 50% of customers who qualify for Free Shipping pay $6.00 to upgrade to 2 Day UPS. 2 Day UPS includes tracking (standard United States Postal Service does not) and you know when your package will arrive.

Remember Picking Time
Orders placed after about noon EST will make it out to a UPS truck on the following day. Keep that in mind when you upgrade. 2 Day can take as many as 3 days depending on what time of day you placed your order.

Want Free Shipping = Subscribe to Email
If you are interested in Free Shipping, be sure to subscirbe to our email list. Email customers receive special offers every week. If you were on our email list today, you received a Free Shipping on all orders email. Use the link below to sign up for our emails if you don't want to miss the next special offer.

Sign up for Sinclair Emails

Better Sex Summer Sale - Last Day

Shop Better Sex Now!

Monday August 4th is the last day of the biggest online sale BetterSex.com has ever had. Thanks to all of our customers who made our Summer Sale a huge success. If you are an email subscriber you received a special bonus today - FREE SHIPPING.

Don't want to miss our next sale or our next Free Shipping Email Only offer? Don't want to miss the chance to vote for what should be on sale? Want to vote in our next poll? Sign up for our private, discreet and secure emails using the link below:

Yes, I want Better Sex emails = use this link to sign up so you don't miss the next cool thing we do for our email subscribers.